Kuwabara?
by tmntyyh
Summary: Yusuke goes over to Kuwabara's house when he gets kicked out by Atsuko and it begins to rain. Yusuke and others get the shock of a lifetime and learns something interesting about Kuwabara.
1. Chapter One

I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho. This idea came to me…somehow. I laughed at the image in my head, and I am pretty sure you will too. Be prepared for anything. To all of the Kuwabara-haters…including myself…will enjoy/be disgusted with this story.

Yusuke's Thoughts 

Yusuke was walking to Kuwabara's house after a drunken Atsuko had thrown him out. It had begun to rain so Yusuke ran. On the way there, Yusuke ran into Shizuru. Shizuru was going to go out with Yukina, Keiko, Genkai, and Botan. Shizuru threw the keys at Yusuke after he told her his story, and after she warned him not to break anything in there…or she'd break something of his. Yusuke tried Kurama's house earlier, but Kurama was at a party with the rest of his family. Hiei…well, no one knew where he was. Yusuke had no other options and went over to Kuwabara's house. Shizuru also said that Kuwabara was in his room, and that he wished not to be disturbed…for some reason. **Wonder what Kuwabara's up to. Well, lets go find out.** Yusuke walked over to a room and opened it. Just his luck, it was Shizuru's Yusuke closed the door and quietly walked over to the next door.

"He he he," came from the other side of the door in a somewhat feminine voice. **Is a girl in there? Wait…do girls even like Kuwabara? Did he pay a prostitute?** Yusuke pressed his ear to the door and felt the cold wood as he heard the same laughter again. Yusuke peeked through the keyhole, but he only saw a small portion of, what looked like, bright blue fabric. Yusuke quietly twisted the doorknob so they would not hear him. As he pulled the door open, Yusuke kept looking through the slowly growing crack. Yusuke then saw something that would scar him for the rest of his life.

"HOLY SHIT!" Yusuke yelled. The sight he saw was one of Kuwabara, wearing a bright blue dress, with mascara, blush, and other makeup on his face. Kuwabara's legs were shaved from what Yusuke could see, before he screamed, drawing Kuwabara's attention away from the full length mirror. Kuwabara was also wearing Stiletto heels, with a matching purse, and the dress was a tight one. Kuwabara's eyes went wide when he saw Yusuke. **Either Kuwabara's a woman, or I don't want to know where his penis is.** When Kuwabara spun around, the barrettes in his hair flew into every direction. **This is gonna give me nightmares for the rest of my life.**

"What are you doing here!" Kuwabara managed to yell. When Kuwabara went to take a step to Yusuke, a small bulge appeared under the tight dress. **That's NASTY!**

"What am I doing here! What the fuck are you doing!" Yusuke yelled back. Kuwabara blushed as he tried to get to his door to close it. Kuwabara was not so lucky; he tripped and landed on his face. "I'm scared for the rest of my life," Yusuke moaned as he blocked his eyes as Kuwabara got up. Kuwabara was glad that Yusuke blocked his eyes because his dress rose up and showed a pair of girls, low-cut panties.

"Can you leave so I can get changed?" Kuwabara asked as he blushed and pulled his dress back down. Yusuke did not open his eyes to find his way out. Instead, he removed one hand from his eyes to feel around for the doorframe, his eyes were closed mind you. Once Yusuke found the doorframe, he walked slowly out of the room backwards and waited for the sound of the door to close. When he heard it, Yusuke opened his eyes. **What the fuck is wrong with him! Did his parents drop him on his head when he was young? No wait…I bet Shizuru would have been the one to do it. **Yusuke waited for a while in the living room. He turned on the television as he tried to get the image out of his mind. Kuwabara came out of his room in a pair of jeans and a white tee shirt.

"We speak of this to no one," Yusuke said. "What you were doing never passes from our lips."

"Should we shake to make it official?" Kuwabara asked as he held out his hand. Yusuke eyes grew wide as he eyed Kuwabara's hand.

"I'd rather take your word," Yusuke said. "Plus, who knows where that's been."

"Yeah you're proba- HEY!" Kuwabara yelled understanding what Yusuke meant. Yusuke grinned and shrugged.

"You never know."

"Yeah. HEY!"

Review to tell me what you thought/ think.


	2. Chapter Two

Disclaimer still stands. Well…I initially intended for it to only have one chapter. But Elvdreamr asked for more, so here you go. Thanks for the three reviews Elvdreamr, animefreak102, and LoversPastForgotten.

To: **Elvdreamr**- This chapter is for you. Glad that you think that it is a funny fic.

To: **animefreak102**- Yup, I'm all about creepy…and this time, more people find out.

To: **LoversPastForgotten**- Of course he is!

**Hiei's Thoughts **

_Kurama's Thoughts _

Kurama was walking with Hiei down the rainy street. "Can you remind me again why we are going to the oaf's house?" Hiei asked.

"Well, yesterday, after we woke up after "certain" activities," Kurama said, making Hiei grin. _It seems that Hiei hasn't forgotten our fun tricks._ "I felt a weird vibe at Kuwabara's house."

"Simple, he's there, that's the weird vibe you got." Kurama smiled as he looked at Hiei.

"You don't really think that."

"Yes, I do. And something tells me that the reason you got that vibe has to do with him acting weird."

"Oh really? How would you know? Been over there when I wasn't looking?" Hiei raised an eyebrow at that question.

"Tell me that you're joking." Kurama smiled and hugged Hiei. "You know that I would pick you over the baka any day."

"I know; I'm just playing with you."

"You know that you've never won any of our "games"…right?"

"Rub it in, why don't you?"

"We're here." Kurama knocked on the door, just loud enough to be heard. Hiei began to look around, seeing how no one had answered the door for a few minutes. "Can we leave now?"

"No. Hiei, can you use your Jagan to see where Kuwabara is?"

"Hn." Hiei took off his bandana and opened his Jagan eye. Hiei began to look around the house, where he saw Kuwabara dancing in front of the mirror. Kuwabara was wearing Victoria's Secret lingerie; the type men want to see women in…not wear themselves. Kuwabara was wearing makeup and slowly stripping while watching himself in his mirror. "AHH!" Hiei closed his Jagan quickly and blocked it with his hands. Kurama watched with worried eyes.

"Hiei! What happened? Is Kuwabara in danger?" Hiei began to twitch as he put on his bandana. _What happened?_

"Go to his window and look in…you'll find the answers you want." **And then some.**

"I will." Kurama walked underneath Kuwabara's window and climbed the tree outside of his window. Hiei was underneath the tree now. **Looks like I'm going to be the one to catch him when he falls out from shock.** Kurama made it to the top of the tree and peered into his window. _What's so…HOLY SHIT! What is he doing!_ Kurama witnessed Kuwabara removing the last article of clothing and saw Kuwabara beginning to fondle himself. Kurama felt himself gagged as he lost his grip on the tree. Hiei held out his arms as Kurama fell down. Hiei caught Kurama, who continued to gag.

"Now you know." **If he is the representative of the Human Race, Yusuke, Keiko, Shizuru, and Genkai have some explaining to do.**

"Let's go home…quickly!"

"Will do." Hiei ran to their house, still holding Kurama. Hiei entered the house through Kurama's open balcony window.

"We speak of this to no one." Hiei put Kurama back on his feet.

"Damn straight. I don't ever want to even mention it."

"Well…we could take our minds off of it with something else."

"I like the way you think." Kurama and Hiei went over to the bed.

Review for more. Sorry, but no lemon in this chapter. If someone asks me to, I will add another chapter, but you have to say who you want to see Kuwabara.


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